Next to the parent-child relationship, it is the marital relationship that has the most important place in a person’s life – because it is a relationship for a lifetime. When your parents are no longer around to love or care for you, it is your spouse who fills that space the most. Your spouse is not just someone with whom you raise your children, he/she is your friend, keeper of secrets, and a pillar of support during hard times.
It is not easy to walk out of a marriage, even when there are no kids involved. The trauma of a marriage that sours can last for a long time and, for some, forever. There is also the stigma of divorce, with people whispering behind your back and insinuating that you are at fault somehow. A divorce touches more than two lives, it touches two families and also their extended network of friends and relatives.
It is true that sometimes, divorce is inevitable. But in many cases, even complicated marriage problems can find resolution through counseling. But an even better solution exists in Vedic astrology – Kundali Matching. This takes place before the families enter into a marriage alliance. Marriage astrology and marriage predictions play a great role in Hindu marriages.
In the days when arranged marriages were common, marriage astrology, that is, Kundali Matching, helped the families to confirm if the boy and girl were compatible in every way. Their horoscopes would be painstakingly analyzed and matched for several parameters like physical and emotional compatibility, wealth, progeny, health, relationship with in-laws, and so on. It also provided a lot of information about the personalities of the couple. This proved to be very helpful to ascertain if the boy and girl would get along well after marriage.
But nowadays, love marriages are more common. In such marriages, horoscope matching is not always done, as the boy and girl know each other well, and they think it’s unnecessary. However, the future is always unknown; it is astrology that can unravel it for us. People may have hidden facets to their personality, which astrology can reveal. Unforeseen events can affect the relationship, like health and money problems. A partner may enter into extramarital affairs. All these are factors that can derail a marriage. But by throwing light on them, astrology helps you to make a more informed choice about a key aspect of your life.
Let us now see how Marriage Counseling and Kundali Matching can help you to have a long and happy marriage.
Conflicts in a marriage need not lead to divorce. If couples are willing to communicate honestly and make some adjustments, they can resolve the problems. If this does not work, they can try marriage counseling. Marriage counseling can make a great difference to your relationship. Here are some benefits of marriage counseling :
Counseling enables both partners to communicate openly about their marital problems. By being honest and discussing things frankly, you can arrive at an understanding.
- Identifying differences
Sometimes, people fail to understand the differences that are causing marital problems. Marriage counseling throws light on the issues in your relationship and helps you to identify and understand the differences. Then you can try to reconcile the differences in the correct manner.
- Support for psychological problems
If one of the partners has a psychological problem, has addictions to drugs or alcohol, suffers from substance abuse, etc., the counselor can team up with a health care professional to address these issues.
Tips to Resolve Marital Problems
- Listen to each other.
- Appreciate your partner’s good qualities.
- Express your desires and needs openly.
- Be open about the things you don’t like about your spouse.
- Take holidays together whenever you have time.
When there are major issues like verbal or physical abuse and chronic illnesses, or if one partner does not attend the counseling sessions or follow the tips, and shows no interest in the relationship due to extramarital affairs, then the problems will persist.
Kundali Matching is one way to find out if the couple will face conflicts in their married life. Ashtakoota Guna Milan system is used in Kundali Matching. As per this system, there are 8 factors or Kootas, which are compared in both the horoscopes. Totally, 36 Gunas have to be matched. If at least 18 Gunas (points) match, then the marriage will be compatible.
- Varna Koota (1 Point): This Koota represents the 4 categories of Varna — Brahmin, Kshatriya, Vaishya, and Shudra.
- Vashya Koota (2 Points): All the zodiac signs of the zodiac are divided into five Vashyasor categories.
- Chatuspada or quadruped – Aries, Taurus, 2nd half of Sagittarius, and first half of Capricorn. 2. Dwipada or Manushya or human – Gemini, Virgo, Libra, first half of Sagittarius and Aquarius. 3. Jalchar Rasior belonging to water – Cancer, 2nd half of Capricorn and Pisces. 4. Banachar Rasi or Roaming in forest – Leo. 5. Keet Rasi or insect – Scorpio. If the boy and girl belong to the same Vashya, it is ideal, and the score is 2 full marks.
- Tara Koota (3 Points): This indicates the couple’s mental compatibility.
- Yoni Koota (4 Points): This represents the couple’s sexual compatibility.
- Graha Maitri Koota (5 Points): This Koota shows the friendship between the Lords of the Rashis of the boy and girl.
- Gana Koota (6 Points): There are 3 Ganas in Nakshatras – Dev Gana, Manushya Gana, and Rakshas Gana. If the Ganas do not match, there will be no mutual understanding.
- Rashi Koota (7 Points): This is the matching of the couple’s Rashis or Bhakoot.
- Nadi Koota (8 Points): The Nakshatras are divided into Adi, Madhya, and Antya. The couple should not have the same Nadi as it causes problems in conceiving or in pregnancy.
It is also important to check for Manglik Dosha in the horoscope. Factors like Longevity, Finances, Health, Future, Children and mutual understanding, etc., are other factors that need scrutiny.
If the horoscopes do not match, then there are astrological remedies to resolve the issue.
Astrological Reasons for Why Many Marriages Fail Today?
Not too long ago, divorce was a huge scandal. People kept it very hush-hush and refused to speak about it, even within the family. It was seen as a stigma and a personal failure. Even when one had legitimate good reasons to divorce, like infertility, infidelity, or abuse, people felt that somehow they had failed at their relationship and felt ashamed. But today, couples are throwing parties for break-ups and divorces! The reasons for this sea change are many.